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When it comes to matters of the heart there is

 

Love is the bridge that make companionship and lust into a beautiful marriage. Typically, people go on date to fall in love, understand what make the other person happy and to build a bond. This bond take the lusty feeling of attraction and the general enjoyment of that persons essence  and molds it into love and romance. Small tasks begin to be cute and romantic and any gesture of generosity makes the butterflies in your stomach dance a jig. Often time once you become a couple dates don't happen as often, generosity becomes expected and the butterflies begin to hibernate.

 

Now that I am married it is harder to get the dates in because my husband and I are entrepreneurs and building successful businesses. Business activities don't stay between 9-5 so we have to schedule dates. Our parenting responsibilities just seem to take a front seat and everything becomes a higher priority then having those butterflies dance again.

 

Here are some of my favorite dates that may help you plan a lusty date.

 

Music Choice and Chill

A little bit of nostalgia can jump start and heart. Music is the sound track with our lives and putting on some throwback Jamz and reminiscing about what we doing, feeling, thinking and experiencing at the time the songs were popular build intamacy. Music is the sound track to our lives and even playing song that set the mood for your relationship can help you remember how those butterflies felt when you first me. Usually, we add a bottle of wine and I make one of our favorite meal and it makes the perfect night. 

 

Go Dream House Shopping

The dating process is designed to figure out if you have chemistry, common values and learning about ambitions. As love grow we often find out that the planning of out lives together becomes the glue to lasting relationships. often paying bills can put a hold on dreams. So  dream house shopping will help rejuvenate your collective dream.

My husband is a Realtor and one of his favorite things to do is go to open houses. He loves to see our future and think of posiblities especially with me. So when I go to open houses with him I dress like its a date, fly dress, cute wedges and hair and make up done. So when we walk into our future homes I look like I belong there. He loves it and we remeber what its like to dream together. 

 

Have an Old Fashion Picnic

Practicality can sometime strangle a relationship. We do what is most convenient and that is so not sexy. Sometimes, making lunch a big deal an really change a dynamic of the same old same old. Grab a basket and fill it with your loves favorite food,  Keery and I once went on a picnic, We had lox and bagels assorted fruit and I even found some chardonnay to smuggle as well.

 

Catch an Unknown Act

Experiences bond you like no other. We share our feelings, we build our together memory bank and we add to the repertoire of cocktail party antidotes. Doing something out of the norm for a couple can be an excellent bonding experience. Choosing to see an unknown act can prove to be just the right amount of danger that you need to get your adrenaline pumping. ITs a win win as a couple if the band is horrible you can bond over the horrible singing and the audacity of the act to even do  an official performance in the first place. But if they are good your stories about how the two of you discovered a new act can be epic. 

 

Live The Robe Life

When my husband and I were dating I could not wait until the end of the week so that I could hang at his house and not be staring all of my responsibilities. It was something I looked forward to and well the best part was that I got some undecided time with my boo. Now being married being around the house on our time off only lends to more of the same. We like to get a room and order room service and we don't even have to leave town. Wearing robes while watching movies and eating in bed is a great way to feel carefree and allows you butterflies to soar.

5 Ways To Bring Back The Butterlies 

Dating tips to keep love alive

Written by Monica Maire Henderson

“True love stories never have endings”

Richard Bach

Love

Love

 

Lust

"No matter what a woman looks like, if she's confindent, she's sexy.”

Paris Hilton

Bringing Sexy Back

Let's Talk About Sex!

Written by Monica Maire Henderson

I was very naive. I know the receipt to keep a man engaged and it so very simple. So I said something stupid early on in my relationship. I said should be able to had sex everyday unless medically I couldn't. Before you get me too much crap let me explain. I have a high sex drive so when I am in a monogamous relationship I am pretty much ready to go whenever but I had never lived with a man until I me my husband. So in my head I had romanticized how I would once I did live with a man. It was going to be on daily. 

 

What I didn't consider is all the other reason I would want to have sex.

 

1. I am just too tired

I completely underestimated how tiring it is to run a company, write blogs, raise a child, listen to my husbands needs mentally emotionally and physically, keep a clean and organized house,  volunteer meditate all while staying fit and looking fly. 

 

Tip: Don't try to do it all everyday. Somedays I am going to be great in one area and sucky in others and it is okay. So when I come home too tired to tango I take a nap and wake him up at midnight or morning sex and get it in early before the day gets away from me.

 

2. I am not feeling that great about myself

Recently, I broke my ankle and could not workout. Long story short not only did I gain weight but my muscle tone which help my still look okay to myself when a little heavier is MIA Can you say cottage cheese thighs. Apparently, it is not enough to have a gorgeous husband, I also must be attracted to myself in order to feel sexy. No one ever told me that. Another point for Team School of Life. 

 

Tip: I started dressing myself in ways that when I look in the mirror I look hot to me. I do hair and makeup more often because it makes me feel pretty. I also focus on a part of my body that still got it like my shoulders, collar bone and my face.

 

3. Sometimen I just don't like him

So no one told me that there are days when I wouldn't like my husband. That some days everything he says and does rubs me the wrong way. I love him still and still want him in my life but that I just annoyed by everything that I once loved about him. Make it kinda hard to want to knock boot. IJS.

 

Tip: When dating we would just retreat to our separate living spaces but when there is no where to run I run errands.  Thats a perfect day to have a girls day or a me day. Its a anyone but him day. It does pass and I am back to thinking he is the bee's knees in no time. 

 

A best friend by definition is someone who is the closet friend. The first person to call to share good or bad news. My best friend is my husband Kerry.  For that reason I have learned that marriage is not just love and lust but companionship.

 

Having a person who will do the boring stuff like errands and taxes with you is just as important as the sexy or romantic stuff. I believe that it truly is the reason why we have a shot at forever. I work hard on my friendship with him because I realize that when our daughter goes of to college and my other friends are busy in the end it will be me and him. The thought of that gives me comfort. true friendship should be forever and so should marriage.  I am happy to be married to my best friend. He is my cheerleader, my voice of reason, a calming force and my homie. We may not have been through too much thick and thin in our life together but the man he is I know that he has my back. I love him and thank God for him everyday. I pray that I am as good of a friend to him as he is to me.

“Happy is the man who finds a true friend, and far happier is he who finds that true friend in his wife”

Franz Schubert

Companionship

Best Friends Forever

Written by Monica Maire Henderson

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Real Love Stories

 

“Every relationship is what you wanted because your actions negotiate that contract from the beginning”

Monica Henderson

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